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Please Don’t Eat Your Realtor

I woke up to this on Facebook today.

I had recently gotten an invite to this group and although I consider myself a meat eating vegetarian, joined because I thought it might help me with my plant based eating conversion. And then I saw this. It took a long time to stop laughing. It does go a long way towards explaining that “Je ne sais quoi” attitude that makes vegans so unlikable

I just went back and looked at the post again. “Lindsay” says, “I’m nit there yet, but I’m Pescatarian and would love to help you!”

Then I thought, maybe they are on to something. What if we all hired professionals and technicians based on some bias which had nothing to do with the skill at hand. Here’s some:

“Looking for recommendations for Rastafarian Roofer. Since the roof is high, figured you should be too”

“Looking for recommendations for yoga realtor. Want house to be a chill meditative space that accepts me with all my flaws and has an innate desire to be a better house. Expecting flexible rooms that stretch well when required. And can take an impressive pose when friends come over”.

“Looking for recommendations for evangelical auto mechanic. I need demons purged from my VW. It craves gas with ethanol and places dancing music on the radio both of which are sins. And I think it fraudulently voted for President in the last election

Looking for recommendations for football playing (past or present) CPA. I want you to take the ball to the IRS, gain some valuable yardage I’ve lost the last few years and try some trick plays with my deductions. You’ll know you’ve scored when my tax liability drops by 50%

Looking for recommendations for a keto realtor. No carbs in my listings. I want a strict high protein house that’s not even gonna lol at a carb

Looking for recommendations for Jewish or Muslim pork producers. Huh? What did you say? Thats not a thing? How come? Ohhhhhh. Hindu beef sellers then?

Looking for redhead gymnast realtor with daddy issues and a slight sex addiction. Oops. Too personal. Never mind.

By zumbalala

Horizontically and vertically challenged with poor eyesight since birth, God gave me beautiful teeth.

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